Season 4 xvii: Foiled

Setting: Logan High School, English Office 222

I love my mornings. The biggest concern I have is dealing with students who don't get along because they were raised on opposite sides of the track (cliche, but true). It's the afternoons that slay me.

I was hired as an English teacher at Logan High. As part of that job, I have the right to sit at my desk, in my shared office, and receive the abuse of my co-workers. It's par for the course when you sign English on the dotted line. Expect the inappropriate and get ready to lie your ass off if you are anything less than "cultured." Being a prude, I have been lying through my teeth or hiding behind the faux wall to avoid any unnecessary attention. Unfortunately that does not suffice.

Today for example: While discussing Thursday night's plans for the entire department (including me, unless I want to beg off with some made up date and a list of lies), Mr. IV's after school activities came up. While the conversation started tame, with only a few sexual implications, it quickly spiraled to dirty. First the women wanted to know if Scrabble was the new code for sex. When this was negated, they moved on to questioning Mr. IV's pacing with girls. By this point, I wanted to shove pencils in my ears or run from the office. Instead, I sat at my desk, nursing what felt like a tomato-red blush and some massive discomfort. While he was slow in answering, his final response landed around "old-fashioned." But they didn't stop there. The conversation moved from a close call to too much questioning before Mr. IV stated that "watching a movie" was the new go to for sex. Christ. If I wasn't getting my blush on before, it would have rushed all over my face right then. Hadn't he just used that phrase this weekend when telling me about his time with her? I DON'T NEED TO KNOW! I wanted to scream, I wanted to leave, but I had to sit still. This wasn't supposed to bother me.

And then they turned on me. It started out innocent. "Alysha, what are you going to drink on Thursday? Beer, Sex on the Beach?" I made the unfortunate mistake and didn't proof my words before they slipped from my lips. "Actually, I like sex on the beach." Tony caught that. And dirty they went. Fine, that one was on me. I can take a little razzing, but what came next was beyond my comfort recovery zone. The discussion moved to my ability to handle the risque office chat. I played it cool, and didn't really give a sign on where I stood. But playing it cool was probably what resulted in my awkwardly saying, "I know things" in response to some question about the discussions in the office. The guys couldn't leave that alone. Both Tony and Mr. IV snagged and ran with it. I laughed it off, but my face felt hot.

My plans are failing.